Shattered Lives

If only I had listened, had turned and walked away,
From that hellish deadly fatal drink
I would not have to pay, for the suffering and the agony,
My evil lust has wrought,
Ruined lives of innocent people,
This sickening moment brought.

Oh Lord my God this pain, keeps tearing at my heart,
My life all of a sudden, is fast falling apart,
The visions and the dreams, they just would not go away,
The memories wretched memories, it seems they are here to stay.

The screams, the blood, the bodies,
Sounds of sirens pierce my ears,
Bringing with them panic, then the worst of all my fears,
They are covering the bodies, Oh no! Oh God! They are dead.
Thoughts of anguish, pain and disbelief,
Keep running through my head.

Could I have caused this agony, what will their loved ones say,
Oh Lord my God! Please help me, I want to run away,
From the life which is before me,
The years of no escape,
From the guilt I feel, because I knew,
Driving drunk is a grave mistake.

“Be inspired, be blessed”

The Master’s Pen

© The National Library of Congress

When

When did I start, to break someone’s heart?
Someone who felt it was worth?
Enduring pain for my birth,
Who shared all of my fears?
Throughout all the years,
And prayed day and night, never ceasing to fight,
Never ceasing to fight, for my peace.

If I could return to when, would I begin again?
To try to taste to see, how anxious would I be?
To cheat to steal to lie, even take the risk to die,
To prove that I belong?
When deep down in my heart, right from the very start,
I knew it was all wrong.

My mind, my heart, my soul,
Are now out of control,
I must, I can, I will, I have to reach,
The poison, that will bring a moment’s thrill,
As evil lying spirits mockingly,
Enjoy my agony insanity,
Who will deliver me?
Romans: 7/25

“Be inspired, be blessed”

The Master’s Pen

© The National Library of Congress

Why Mommy, Why Daddy?

Why Mommy, why Daddy?
Tell me why did this have to be?
Why Mommy, why Daddy?
Why could we not be a family?

Could you not be there when I went to bed?
Could you not give me a kiss on the head?
Could you not show me you loved me?
Why Mommy why Daddy?
Why could we not be a happy family?

Tell me why Mommy, why Daddy?
Why did things have to go wrong?
Tell me why Mommy, why Daddy?
Tell me where I now belong?

“Be inspired, be blessed”

The Master’s Pen

© The National Library of Congress

Christopher’s Song

I wish I could say that I am sorry,
For the pain you are feeling now,
I could heal your broken heart,
If I made a brand new start,
But I’ve always been too late somehow.
I wish I could say I am sorry.

I wish I could send you a letter,
But even if, these lifeless hands, could hold a pen,
No words could convey, or bring back yesterday,
So that I could say I am sorry.

Somewhere my will to fight and to do what was right,
Was lost in a crowd of friends,
And now it is too late, I have chosen my fate,
In this moment my short life ends.
I wish I could say I am sorry.

“Be inspired, be blessed”

The Master’s Pen

© The National Library of Congress

Cruel “Love”

You were my father and I loved you so much,
I trusted, believed you, I longed for your touch,
The feel of your hand when you stroked my hair,
Made all of my tears and fears disappear.
You were my daddy, you could do no wrong,
You were my hero, so big and so strong.
Then after a while, things started to change,
Your touch, which I loved, made me feel so strange.
I no longer wanted to be close to you,
Somewhere, somehow, it seemed that I knew,
That the way you loved me was not really good,
It was not the way that a real daddy should.
And now my father, now that I know,
Tell me what can I do and where can I go?
To remove the shame and pain from my heart,
I can never go back and have a new start.
Why did this happen, why did this have to be?
Why were you not a real father who truly loved me?

“Be inspired, be blessed”

The Master’s Pen

© The National Library of Congress

A Knock On My Door

A pain in my heart which seeped through my soul,
Wretched, tortuous agony,
A prayer that I surface from this deep dark hole,
From this hellish misery.

Oh my God! Oh no! Tell me it is not so,
Someone made a big mistake!
Holy Spirit! Oh Jesus! Oh God! Let me know,
It’s a bad dream from which I will awake.

My Christopher! My love! My precious grandson!
God’s blessed gift to me,
He was weak, he was strong, he was life, he was love,
He was gifted to be able to see.

Deeper than most, into the good things of life,
And into hellish evil too,
He would battle each day with inward strife,
Believing  that God would see him through.

But now there came a knock on my door,
And all of a sudden I knew,
His spirit was willing, but his flesh was weak,
Yet I know!  God has seen him through.

To a “better place,” where he said he would go,
Where no evil spirit or foe,
Could cause him to suffer anymore,
Through the valleys he walked below.

For now he walks on pastures green,
Beside a crystal sea,
Where one day soon, with him I will share,
Blessed eternity.

Be inspired, be blessed
The Master’s Pen

The Drummer’s Sound

I feel I am spinning, spinning, spinning, on a great merry go round,
Everyone is asking questions, yet no answers have been found,
Music places, voices, faces, everything around me races,
Faster, faster, is the cry, we must rush before we die.

I am young but I am tired, it seems so much has transpired,
Since I came onto earth’s all confusing stage,
I have heard so many voices, offering so many choices,
Yet I feel I am trapped within a stifling cage.

Should I get off, I am thinking now and yet I feel somewhere, somehow,
I have a key to set those free who ride with me,
I know that I am in this place, to change the race to the Drummer’s pace,
Which sounds like heaven’s jubilee.

The beat is love and joy and peace and as my spinning starts to cease,
I must tell those still spinning around to stop!……
And listen for the Drummer’s sound.

“Be inspired, be blessed”
The Master’s Pen